I Think We Found Our Next Bachelorette....Stephanie (Brian's Girlfriend)

We Slept Together Even Though I Threw Rocks At You!

Let's get straight to the important stuff, one of my favorite people ever to appear on the Bachelor/ette series, Stephanie.  Des gets a call from Harrison telling her he needs to see her immediately down at the house.  It must be every Bachelorette's worst nightmare to pick up your phone and see Harrison on the caller ID as you know drama is about to ensue.

Des get's to the Bachelor house and goes outside to talk to Brian about his past relationships.   Brian seems oblivious to the fact that he is being set up when our dear girl Stephanie (Brian's girlfriend) comes storming through the house and out to the patio to confront Brian.  We learn that Brian slept with Stephanie after she threw rocks at his face because he was leaving on a business trip (aka The Bachelorette).

I don't really see why Brian was kicked off, who wouldn't break up with a girl that throws rocks at your face.  Who really throws rocks past the 3rd grade?

My idea for the next Bachelorette would be to have Stephanie handing out roses and when you get eliminated she throws a rock at you, it would be must see TV.

As for the rest of the show:

Brooks: Breaks his finger playing dodgeball and is treated like he lost a limb.  Multiple paramedics, ambulances, tubes up the nose.  It was straight out of Tierra's handbook, I mean put a splint on it and move on.  Let's hope he can get that splint removed before fantasy suite season arrives.

Michael G: Is stoked that there are 9 great dudes going on the group date.

Brad: Has a 3 year old kid and a domestic violence rap.  Nothing out of the ordinary here let's give him a rose.  

Kasey: Went on one of the most awkward dates in the show's history and despite being in the middle of a Tsunami tried to make out with Des.  #awkward

Who Pablo: Wins the fake fight challenge and gets a chance to plug the Lone Ranger for ABC.  During the plug he makes out with Des while they both have popcorn in their mouth.   Des you really need to stop speaking Spanish when you give Who the rose.   You keep saying "I will accept that rose".

James: Convinces Des to give him a rose because his dad has cancer.

Bryden: For being such a brave soldier you really are a wuss when it comes to making a move on Des.  

Ben: Steals Des away for a car ride and makeout.  He is playing the Vienna/Courteney/Tierra role perfectly, well done.

Mikey: Wants to kill Ben.

Brandon: We kinda knew Brandon was a little crazy/stalkerish form talking about squishing butterflies to spying on Des from a deck.  Des did the right thing setting him free but I didn't see her give him back his mother's 7 year sober chip.  That sucks he loses the girl and the chip and tells us his heart was just smashed with a hammer and that he is out of tears....ouch, that was hard to watch.  


So the two hottest guys in my mind are Drew and California Zak neither of which has gotten much time, I expect them to have their coming out party this week.  Can't wait for more drama to unfold.  

My Reasons Are Right; My Reasons Are Right; This Recap Is Simply Out of Sight

In honor of the Soulja Boy rap episode I will go ahead and rap the summary (BTW ABC you may have wanted to research what "Superman That Ho" means before you cast Soulja Boy, let's just say I don't know if Supermanning a Ho is conducive to finding true and everlasting love).

One on One: Brooks
Brooks got the first date; and the date was first rate.
Went to the Hollywood sign; Des you lookin fine.
No No don't go past the road block; would you like to see my &*(&?
My dad moved away and I can cry; I've got this in the bag the other dudes shouldn't even try.

Group Date: Right Reasons Right Reasons I'm Here For You Girl Through All 4 Seasons
Soulja Boy here to teach you to rap; I will be shocked if this isn't crap
Oh no Juan Pablo; Did you just yell Superman that ho?
Mikey and Michael have an obsession with Ben; Almost seems that they might like men
James tried to rhyme like a true meathead; it appears that between the ears he is nothing but dead
Brandon showed his schlong; Did he just get blurred oh man that is wrong
For Will This Should be a great chance; Oh wait nevermind the brother can't dance

One on One: Bryden: Malibu/Camarillo/Ojai
A drive through Malibu with lunch at Neptune's Net; Not a bad day for the Iraq vet
On to an orange grove in Camarillo; Look behind the tree is that jonobeingjono
Des asked Bryden if he liked the cheese brie; And Bryden was left to wonder who is she?
At dinner he showed pictures of a horrible crash; Are you going to eat that or throw it in the trash?
On to the tub oh man this is weird; Is the kiss ever coming as Bryden just leered


Inevitably week one is always a pissing contest to see who has the most baggage, the worst disease, the most neglectful parents or the most devastating injury.  This year is no different there were multiple run away dads, a drug addict mom, Diabetes and a single dad.  Since when did letting someone know how messed up you are become attractive?

Poor Michael G didn't get to finish his story about when his mommy called him about his diabetes because Ben kept interrupting him.  Michael G and Ben this is the Bachelorette not the Bachelor you two looked exactly like Ashlee and Tierra from last season.

In the end we say goodbye to Will (it was good to see the Bachelor/ette getting back to the norm and getting rid of the minorities after week 1); Nick M. (not sure who he was); Robert (back to sign twirling buddy, and FYI I just invented these signs off the freeway we are calling them billboards); Mike R (who?).

Next week looks great as we might get to see the fake fight ABC has been touting and somebody's girlfriend shows up which is always entertainment gold.

Calling On All DESbians the Bachelorette is Back!

I just want to find my knight in Shining Armor

So, the blog has had a two month hiatus since that magical moment when SeanCat got together (I am eagerly awaiting their TV marriage despite the breakup rumors which I know are a media fabrication).  BTW ABC, why not do an eight week season leading up to the marriage where we could watch all of the wedding preparation and crazy hi-jinks that would undoubtedly follow? Call me if you need an EP, I truly believe that JBJP (JonoBeingJonoProductions) would put RSP (Ryan Seacrest Productions) to shame.

Okay, back to the matter at hand America's sweetheart Des chasing that ever-elusive fairy tale with a bunch of creeps.

Let's meet some of the Bachelors:

Ben: Brings his kid to the show, the kid that he apparently had with a friend. Red Flag? Nope it got him the first rose, genius move emotional scarring be damned.  I loved that as soon as he got the rose he starts dishing advice to everyone else..... just be yourself......don't force it.......get time with her.  Great advice, very helpful.

Brad: Brought the wishbone,  who doesn't find animal bones sexy?

Brandon: Flipped his mother's 7 years sober chip to decide whether to audition for the show or go to a birthday party and miraculously it came up with go to the audition.  He then gave the 7 year sober chip to Des to give back to him mom during the hometown dates.  Uh ok, a little intense for my liking.       

Brooks: What is the bachelor/ette without a Mormon.  I wouldn't count him out he was kinda cute with Des with a 2nd hug and Mormons always do well on the show (ie Bentley & Jef).  

Bryden: Iraq war vet, was there any question he wasn't getting a rose on Memorial Day especially after we learned of his affinity for random Iraqi children. 

Chris: Got down on one knee and asked Des if he could tie his shoe ohhhhh, almost got us, we thought you were getting engaged.  It was a decent effort at Bachelorette humor.  

Diogo: Poor poor poor Diogo.  Homey stepped out in shining armor and couldn't even get a rose, and in the end tells us that he has an explosion of love and feelings inside of him.  At least she could pronounce your name Diogo, pronunciation didn't go quite so well for Juan Pablo. 

Juan Pablo: Or is it Janparro, Juanpardo.  So classic and then to help Des pronounce it he tells her to say "who" now Juan Pablo Des followed with Whopablo, oh well he is a hot soccer player which gets you a rose.    

Drew: He is hot, I don't know what else to say at this point, likely frontrunner.

Jonathan: Jonathan the lawyer (coincidence, I think not, he has similar game to myself) offered Des the opportunity to proceed directly to the fantasy suite.  It actually was a cute idea if he didn't take it so seriously and then bring it up 14 more times during the night which got him the pre-rose ceremony boot, a true honor.   

Kasey: Mr. Hashtag.  #howdidhegetarose #douchebag #turningeveryeventintoahashtagissoplayedandissuperlame

Larry: Tried to dip Des and she ripped her dress which caused Larry to obsess about "the dip" all night.  Larry, you are a doctor, why not talk more about your income and less about the dip.  He actually seemed funny, should have got a rose.   

Micah: Designed his own suit and got bounced.  

Mikey:  Gave some real in depth anyalysis "my biggest competition is the remaining guys who don't have a rose."  This guy is smart and has the strategy down, watch out.

Nick R: How does a magician not last week one?  What girl wouldn't want to be a magician's assistant it certainly beats being a SAHM.  

Robert:  Invented directional advertising.  To be honest I'm not sure this is really an invention, but I guess I'll give it to him.     

Will:  Don't hate on Will, if you aren't willing to high five randoms in the street then you are just a glass half empty negative Nancy.   

Zack: Likes to show his naked body and showed up with no shirt.  A word of advice if you are going to try and look cool by jumping off a cliff you need to lose the aqua socks.   Why could he have not made it to the rose ceremony, I so bad wanted to see where Des was going to pin that rose can you imagine the discomfort as she tries to pin it somewhere in his nether regions.   

Should be an exciting season, I personally am a DESbian and can't wait for her to find true love and ABC almost made those fistfights look real.

P.S. For those interested in my fantasy league I drafted Brooks, Micah and Zack.

She Got Her Beefcake

Gold Beats Silver

The episode begins with the typical kooks in the audience and then Harrison lets us know that there is some late breaking news that ABC has just learned in the last 24 hours.  What could it be......Lindsay is pregnant.......Sean and Catherine eloped, how am I going to wait three hours for this.

Pan to Sean with his family and his nephew letting him know that he is a loser and that Emily didn't pick him, classic.

Meet the Family:
Catherine meets the fam, and I think she forgot her shoes.  The meeting goes great and Sean's Dad steals the show, this guy needs his own show.

Lindsay meets the fam, and she forgot to apply tatt-off.  The meeting also goes great with Sean's Dad once again stealing the show.  Sean's mom awkwardly asks what they have been doing, well you know we have just been hooking up non stop errrrrr I mean feeding monkeys.   The fam also asks her about the wedding dress incident on night one, to which she gives an awkward giggle, well you know a little too much champagne hahahahaha.  Lindsay ends the family meeting by asking Sean's dad for his son's hand in marriage, good one Lindsay you are a regular Jerry Seinfeld.

Sean's mom proceeds to break down and let Sean know he is going to have to put a lot of thought into this, sound advice, she better put a lockdown on her hubby because as soon as he leaves her he is America's No. 1 most eligible Bachelor.

Sean and Lindsay Date:
Sean and Lindsay go floating on a river and Sean informs her that Myanmar is on the other side of the river and Laos is up where the mountains are.  Trust me Lindsay has no clue what you are talking about.  Sean and Lindsay make some fake hand binoculars and giggle, oh they are so much fun together.  Back to the suite where Lindsay has crafted some love themed lanterns (she stole that idea from Ashleigh's season).  They release the lanterns, make out some more and Sean leaves.  Pretty boring date for the final two.    

Sean and Catherine Date:
Sean and Catherine go Elephant riding and are being their cute selves.  They head back to the Suite and Catherine finally lets those ever important walls down and gives Sean a touching I Love You to which he responds "I had a great day" which sends Catherine into a crying panic attack following by some stalking, but  it worked.

Studio Audience/Losers Analysis:
Harrison gets two women from the audience to break it down for us and they let us know that he has such great chemistry with both and that it could be either one of them that gets picked.  Wow, thanks for the in depth analysis, I didn't realize that he was going to pick one of them.

On to the losers, Leslie lets us know it will be Catherine and tries to make a funny joke about multiplying haha.  Sarah, Ashlee and some girl named Jackie, who was allegedly on the show, all say it will be Lindsay.  Harrison awkwardly proceeds to ask Ashlee why the remaining girls were better than her.  Harrison, have you not heard that she has abandonment issues, leave the poor girl alone.  

(ABC I am not falling for this note, don't even try it)

The Engagement/Breakup:
Finally the moment we have all been waiting for, I am breathless, heart racing, palms sweating.  The girls and Sean are getting ready and we can easily determine that Sean definitely has a bigger rack than Lindsay, this could be problematic for her.

Lindsay lets us know that this is everything she has ever wanted and that it was dangling right in front of her
(Insert Sean dangling in front of her joke, this is almost as easy as Catherine saying she was going out on a limb)

First out of the Mitsubishi Montero (wait a second is that a foot tat) why yes it is Lindsay, oh and she also has a wrist tat, umm why have we not seen this before, talk about clever editing.
Strike 1: Wedding dress getting out of the limo
Strike 2: Too much champagne night one
Strike 3: Multiple tats
and she is out.

Lindsay asks Sean was it me?  No it wasn't you it was the multiple tattoos and the fact that you got out of the limo in a wedding dress, but it had nothing to do with you.  Lindsay rips off her high heels and heads for the Mitsubishi (ABC if you're not going to spring for a Limo could you at least go with an Escalade or a Tahoe), I half expected Lindsay to throw her hair up into a pony and reveal that she had  a t-shirt and sweats on underneath.  She is obviously devastated, I mean they fed monkeys together.

Finally Harrison delivers the letter we have been waiting for and shockingly ABC got us again, it wasn't Catherine dumping Sean but rather a beautiful love note.

Finally arriving is my dear sweet Catherine, I gotta give it to her she looks great and she has a golden smile.  I feel it necessary to remind you of my blog from January 29, 2013 and I quote: "Why is Catherine not getting any love?  She is absolutely my favorite.  She has the cutest face of anyone left and she is comedy gold.  Let me remind you of some her classic quotes: "Oh Tierrable", "I'm vegan but I love the beef", About Kacie B showing up in week 1 "animal attack on the eyeballs".  Catherine if it doesn't work out with Sean I would love to have you as a guest poster on JBJ."

I am not giving myself enough credit, I could not have been more right.

I must admit my heart melted a bit during the proposal it was the most beautiful and dramatic proposal in Bachelor history.  And Tierra's eyebrow has nothing on Catherine's nostrils which went nuts during the proposal, but what do you expect no one can control their nostrils without botox or perhaps a nose job.  In honor of the nostril flaring I have started a twitter page to compete with @TierrasEyebrow it is @cathys_nostril so go ahead and give it a follow for any updates on the nostrils.

Alright lets get to this late breaking news and it is: Sean and Catherine will be getting married at an undetermined date on TV.  You can't be serious with this one Harrison.  Tell me this is not what you were hyping for the last three hours, alas that is our breaking news (insert sound of overbidding on the showcase showdown on price of right).

Last but not least we learn that Des is the next Bachelorette, she should be pretty entertaining and just imagine when the final two have to meet Nate, look out.  My brother is a finalist and if he does make it and Des comes to our hometown I can't wait to give her the Nate treatment and call her nothing but a playgirl.


Well, it has been a truly epic season filled with drama, romance and in the end true love.  Until the Bachelorette starts in May I may have to find some other shows to blog about, judging from the commercials tonight Preachers' Daughters looks like a good candidate.  Until next time just remember that if your relationship is not as exciting as Sean and Catherine's you are a failure destined for breakup and/or divorce.

JBJ

Women Tell All: The Sparkle Is Back

I Am Awesome

Who Loves the Bachelor? Yay
Who Loves Sean? Yayyyyyyy
Who Loves Sean With His Shirt Off? Did two girls in the audience really just high five, oh yes they did.

The episode begins with Harrison and Sean hitting the road in a party bus to ambush some viewing parties.  I love how Harrison was talking like they were undercover spies, whispering to Sean to come on as if the people at the party had no idea they were coming.

The sorority house got somewhat interesting as the girls went JBJ at Lake Havasu circa 1995 with a "take it off" chant.  Their chant works and frat boy Sean takes it off.  I am already planning my chant for  Des when she and Harrison come to my viewing party for next season's Bachelorette.

Anyone else notice that there wasn't a single dude at the viewing parties?  Am I the only man in America who can appreciate true love?

In a new twist Bachelor producers are letting us listen in on conversations which are taking place while the show is supposedly not live, ewwwww how edgy we are getting such inside information I feel like a Hollywood Insider.  

Finally the moment we are all waiting for Tierrable the Tierraorist is going to make her appearance.  After a stern lecture from Harrison about hearing her out Tierra joins him on stage to a smattering of claps.

10 things we learned from Tierra in the hotseat:
1) Tierra is misunderstood.
2) AshLee lies but is not a liar
3) Tierra is engaged but no comment on when it happened (is a no comment allowed on a women tell all?).
4) There was a girl named Brooke on the show that we have never seen before who has a lot to say about the Tierra situation despite having only been with her for 2 hours the first night.
5) Robyn and Leslie are shocked by Tierra's lack of regret for her actions.  Leslie must have had the "she made her own cot now she can lie it" joke teed up for weeks, she couldn't even get through the joke without chuckling.
6) If Selma says good morning you damn well better say good morning back.
7) Tierra was Little Miss Nevada, hence her sparkle is legit. 
8) Tierra lights up a room with the morals that she has.
9) Tierra has a father (I thought she had broken family trailer park written all over her)
10) Tierra cannot in fact control her eyebrows.


I was left wanting after the Tierra interview, she lost her swagger, I wanted her to tell those b#*%#es to kiss her ring.

Next up in the hotseat was Sarah.  The only eventful part of her interview was the woman in the audience fighting through tears to say she was my favorite.   Basically we learn from Sarah that she is smart, funny, nice but will never marry, due to her one arm.

Future Bachelorette Des lets us know she is perfect and Sean blew it.  I actually may have to agree, I think she was his best option.  Sean lets us know that Des hides behind her smile and wouldn't let him in (you didn't take her to the fantasy suite so how do you know?).

Did anyone else notice when Sean came out and the girls were clapping that ABC panned to Sarah clapping, that's messed up.

AshLee turns the drama up a bit by letting us know that Sean confessed to her in the fantasy suite that he had no feeling for the other girls.  Don't trip Sean, who amongst us hasn't said something untrue to gain an advantage while in a fantasy suite?   AshLee get over it you were boring and he didn't want to come home every day from work to hear about your abandonment issues.

The previews look pretty intense for the finale.  I paused on the letter and tried to view it with a magnifying glass and (spoiler alert: I was able to spot the words Sean and ripping).  I have been predicting for weeks that the letter is from Des.  ABC has duped me one too many times over the years (ie Sean lives with his parents, Des has a possessive boyfriend, Tierra was on the show to find love) I am not falling for the illusion that on off the women left him at the altar with a letter.

Did Catherine really just say in the preview she is "going out on a limb" (insert tree joke), that is just too easy, I need more of a challenge than that.

I can't wait for next week's 3 hour extravaganza, you can join me on twitter @jonobeingjono for a live tweet up throughout the episode.        

(He better not pick Lindsay)

You Didn't Let Him Enter the Cave and You Got Sent Home

No Spelunking For You

Episode starts with Sean explaining that he is so excited to be in the South of Thailand.  Call me unsophisticated but has anyone ever heard it called the South of Thailand?  I've heard South of France but never South of Thailand.

Lindsay:
Sean learns that the one thing Lindsay won't do is eat a bug, oh and lookie here an assortment of bugs at a Thai market.  Sean exclaims "what do we have here" and Lindsay whispers to him "they are bugs".  Lindsay, you are a regular Sherlock Holmes we would have never known what all those creepy crawly things were.  Lindsay eats the bug to prove her love for Sean (***explicit content warning), that is probably not the only thing Lindsay is willing to put in her mouth to gain Sean's love.  Sorry.

Now that Sean knows Lindsay will do anything it seems time to transition to the fantasy suite.  Lindsay awkwardly tells Sean she loves him and they retire to the suite without hesitation or any caveat from Lindsay that by going to the fantasy suite she is not a slut.

AshLee:
We learn that AshLee has abandonment issues (shocking we haven't heard this from her prior) and that the only way to get over her issues would be to swim through a cave and a very skimpy bikini.  I don't know what she is worried about she has two quite capable floating devices.  As Sean and AshLee swim through the cave we learn that she has not been this vulnerable since two weeks ago when she blindfolded herself.

AshLee tells us that this is how life is when you are with the person you love it is like going down a dark alley way.  So true, what married person doesn't feel like they could be jumped at any moment.

AshLee lets Sean know that entering the cave was not a metaphor for what would be happening in the fantasy suite and that they would be talking all night long......uh bye bye.  

AshLee a word of advice for future reality show endeavors (perhaps Bachelor Pad).  I could have sworn that earlier in the episode I saw a tongue ring and I definitely saw your bathing suit.  You aren't fooling anyone including Sean with the sudden spat of morality, now get yourself in that fantasy suite and let Sean do some more spelunking so that you can show him that you really are soulmates.

Catherine:
Catherine lets Sean know that she is super silly but also really serious (trees will do that to you).  Sean tells her he loves her weirdness and tries to brush her hair back and pokes her in the eye (a symbolic branch to the eye if you will).

Catherine tells Sean that Seattle is expired.  Who doesn't compare their city to milk?

She then lets us know she has been worried about showing a different side of herself in the fantasy suite (the naked side) uhh last I checked that is the whole point of the fantasy suite.   Catherine says when the show began she thought about what goes on in the fantasy suite and that she wouldn't let herself do THAT but then weeks went by and she realized it has nothing to do with THAT but it is about spending time with Sean, doing THAT and that she is now okay with doing THAT.

Catherine lets us know that it feels good to just have the two of them spending intimate time with no one else around.  The fact that we are watching you two in the pool this makes me think that it isn't just you two?

Harrison:
Now would be a good time to address the tweets posted throughout the show as we get a tweet from Chris Harrison "Each date card is handcrafted & signed with love or the hope of love".  A little creepy C-Harr.  ABC are we trying to watch the evolution of true love or an episode of pop-up video?  I didn't love the tweets but I must admit I fired off a few in hopes of making the show.

Harrison appears and tells us to imagine being in a beautiful land entangled with 3 beautiful women, oh no this sounds serious, psyche a 15 minute commercial for Oz.

The Videos:
Lindsay gives us a cute wedding dress joke and is anyone else annoyed by the way she talks?  I can only describe her as mousy.  Hopefully she won't be as drunk at their real wedding as she was on the first night of the season.

AshLee, oh Ashlee you definitely sealed your fate with the crying video.  You have to give just a little cry and then pull it together.  He was scared of your emotional instability and constant talk of walls and abandonment and issues and the video sealed it.  It's really unfortunate because your body had some real potential to find true love.  (Oh and ABC you dropped the ball, a snarky tweet would have been perfectly timed during AshLee's cryfest)

Catherine lets Sean know that he is a megahunk that gives her the wiggles.  Classic Catherine and that is why she is still around, good for her.

Rose Ceremony:
The girls are looking lovely, AshLee really has broken down some walls to the point that she may or may not have just had a nipslip as Harrison escorted her in.  Wait, should I be pausing this right on AshLee's chest when my wife is in the room?  But, she has a stripe on her right boob, what is that?

Sean obviously picks Lindsay and then takes an eternity to annihilate AshLee's hopes and dreams.  BTW, where is Harrison, there is only one rose remaining from what I can tell, but I can't be sure, where is the announcement, I am so confused, could there be two roses remaining?  Alas, I suppose ABC left it to our own intelligence and there was only one rose and it went to not AshLee.  I feel an epic meltdown coming.

Sean asks Ashlee to at least let him explain and give his reason why, she waits and he tells her that it was a very hard decision.  Ummm, that is not a reason why.  Emotional baggage, now that is a reason why.  Too serious, another reason why.  Got married at age 17, another reason why.  Oh well, we'll have to live with it was hard and you are a great person as the reason Sean gave us.  In all honesty, it was a bit sad though, I did like AshLee and I hope that she can find someone that will love her and good news for her she actually held up decently in the ride of shame, she had to hide her face but she didn't say anything too embarrassing, I expected it to be much worse.         


So it comes down to this.  A girl who on night one dressed up in a wedding dress, got wasted and tried to make out with Sean v. A girl who has a nose ring that learned from a tree at the age of 12 that all she wanted out of life was to be married.   Either way Sean is a winner.

Sean Tells All, Well Kind of All

What kind of tell all doesn't discuss details of the fantasy suites, lame.  ABC if you are going to promote a tell all we demand to know what base Sean got to with each and every girl and how many times.

Instead the show starts with Sean telling us how excited he is for the alone dates so he can be away from the cameras and the girls can feel comfortable asking him anything oh and so he can see them naked.

We then find out that Sean wanted to hit poor Nathan for calling him a playboy as nothing could be further from the truth.

Sean & AshLee

Sean & Catherine

Sean & Des

Sean & Kristy

Sean & Leslie

Sean & Lindsay

Sean & Robyn

Sean & Sarah

Sean & Selma

Sean & Tierra

Clearly Nathan has no clue what he is talking about I'll go with Sean and we'll just chalk it up to Nathan being a jackass.

Did Heidi Montag just get a tweet through, what does JBJ have to do to get a tweet read.

Leslie told Sean to stick it in her mouth and she didn't make it to the fantasy suite why?

Harrison addresses the rumors that Tierra is a plant and that ABC made him keep her etc.. etc.. Sean replies that this was not the case and that he was not aware of what was going on or he would have sent her home.

Then Harrison talks about Montana and how Sean witnessed the fight between Tierra and Robyn that went on for several hours.  Wait a second didn't you just say that you had no idea Tierra was like that?  Which is it you knew or didn't know about Tierra?

BTW, who has the stamina to fight for several hours?  You fight for a half hour or so, say a weak sorry and makeup in a physical manner, it works every time.

I want to meet Shades of Gray's mother.

Daniella, what kind of Harrison impression doesn't address "ladies this is the final rose"?  Although that was the most we saw of you all season.

Harrison then goes to the fantasy suite issue by asking Sean: "Let's be honest what takes place inside the fantasy suite."  Oh no he didn't!  Harrison went there.  Harrison then asks if it is a chance to be physical?  To which Sean gives him a nunya bizness.  So apparently Sean will bang all three but not discuss it, ahhhh I'm with you Harrison it is so nice to see that there are still gentlemen out there.

The previews look pretty dramatic Catherine declines Sean's offer to see if they are really in love by laying with him, someone sends him a note to the alter (my guess is Des), Ashlee lets Sean know that she has some abandonment issues and Sean gets Lindsay pregnant, should be fascinating.

Oh boy, I hope you all stuck around to the end.  If you didn't then you missed this:

Do I have to confess to my Bishop that I have viewed man porn?