I Will Miss You Black Box

Welcome to the picture issue, trying something new this week.

Oh, Julian, it is sad to see you go.  I mean your one on one date went so well, I don't know what happened.  I personally love going out to eat and answering important hypotheticals such as would you rather sleep with a ratchet homeless chick or abstain for 5 years?  Talk about an impossible scenario, is there not a third option?  Well he made out with you Julian, so it is probably a good thing that your hypothetical didn't involve sleeping with a man.  In honor of your departure I thought we would pay homage:

My butt is hungry and it is eating my swimsuit

Should you really have an ipad that close to the pool?

Shorts?

Frontal?

Nice to Meet You Chris' Family

I don't blame Chris for getting rid of her, who really wants to marry a girl with an ipad permanently attached to her butt?  I do have to ask was the black box really necessary all the time, what is she hiding?  Could it be that Julian is a man?  If so I imagine Chris will someday regret this:

Do I feel something on my leg?

 I'm not too worried about the loss of Julian, so long as we have Kaitlyn:

Thanks For Lending Me Your Box, Julian

I loved Kaitlyn's reaction upon learning that not only was Ashley I a virgin, but also Becca.  It was like she saw Bigfoot and the Abominable Snowman at the same time.

While we are on the subject of Virgins:

My Mouth Aint a Virgin

Ashley I is my favorite virgin of all time.  Let's be real 1) Topless; 2) Buddha Belly Button Ring; 3) Looks up to the Kardashians; 4) Aggressive maker outer.  C'mon Ashley, I'm not buying it, and apparently neither is Chris, did you see the look of shock when you told him?

Speaking of shocked, why was Ashley S let go?  She seemed so normal and down to earth:

These Bitches Are Dead To Me

I Love You

Anybody Seen My Medication?

Speaking of creepy, how about the camera man offering to help Kelsey when a bee stung her vijayjay:

Could I rub some ointment on that?

What is more aggravating Kelsey's laugh or Whitney's voice?
 

I didn't get the Cinderalla Date? What?  But I am the favorite?

Wow, Chris is a real great communicator.
Britt: So Chris are you validating slutty behavior by giving Kaitlyn a rose?
Chris: Umm, eehh, Kaitlyn, errr, uhh, noooorrr, eeyyyy, sooo, well, uhhh, I'm out of here I'm a man.
I must admit I can't quite figure out Jade.  She seemed like such a sweet girl on the Cinderella date (BTW, it was so interesting that ABC did a whole Cinderella re-enactment, is there a Cinderella movie coming out or something?  Stay Tuned.).

Ahh, I'm Jade a sweet young girl from Nebraska

I'm Jade just another Nebraskan Hoe (farming reference) who move to L.A. and owns a pair of stripper hills.

Finally, next week we get to leave the mansion.  We all know it is hard to find true love while living in a mansion and going on local dates.  To find true love you need to travel the world and go on international dates so it should be exceptional.

My power rankings:
1. Britt
2. Jade
3. Whitney

My Fantasy Team:
1. Kelsey
2. Ashley S