 |
| You Want True Love You Gotta Beef Up Son |
So, I've been told that if you want someone to pay attention to you, you have to ignore them to make them really want it. Hence, I have not been blogging for two weeks....tying to build a little anticipation, I hope I don't disappoint.
Why has the Bachelor never done a red carpet/3 hour premiere? I thought it was amazing and I could have watched for another 2 hours, easy.
It is great to see that Andi and Josh are happily in love and ready to get married and have babies. Wait, they broke up the next day? Noooooooo. How? What guy wouldn't want a girl constantly talking over you? Who wouldn't want a girl that slept with a dude the day before she chose you? Consider me baffled.
Oh and Nikki is back, could Harrison be chomping more at the bit? Harrison could barely contain himself and the opportunity to officially destroy Who Pablo.
Harrison: So Nikki did it just suck being with a loser who would not say on national TV that he loved you, even when I insisted that he do so?
Nikki: No, he is a great guy, we were just different.
Harrison: Oh, I see, so he physically abused you right?
Nikki: No, we were just different.
Harrison: I get it, I get it, he is a cokesnorting sex addict.
Hey Nik, you look a little different.....I approve of the two changes.
I was shocked to see Chris Bukowski in every shot on the red carpet. No one saw that coming, but where was Elise?
Finally onto the main event, Chris Soules the farmer is finally here. Oh and he put in some time with Codycode and is lookin fiiiiiiiiiiine (sidebar: how did Money and Codycode not work out?, they seemed like a perfect match).
I for one will never get tired of the farm references, puns and play-on-words it is clever, intelligent, comedy gold. On that note lets go straight to:
Kaitlyn: You can plow the *&#* out of my field anytime, followed by her insisting on telling a joke about a tight seal, immediately after Chris telling the ladies how serious he is taking this process. Not to mention she has tats on each elbow. Ding, ding, ding we have a winner.
Britt: This girl is hot, why exactly is she on Hollywood Blvd. giving out free hugs? I did like the idea of giving free hug coupon to Chris, I give out coupons as gifts all the time and my lady loves it.
Whitney: A fertility nurse whose voice would keep anyone from getting pregnant. For real that voice is painful.
Ashley I: Good looking girl, but no way she is moving from Jersey to a farm in Iowa.
Tara and Jordan: Could someone please get these ladies a drink they seem like they need to loosen up. These two are definitely here to find true love......or free drinks.
Mackenzie: Has a son named Kale. Hey this could work, she named her son after produce, what farmer wouldn't appreciate that. I personally would have went with Arugula.
Tandra: From Utah and named Tandra, go figure.
Michelle: From Utah and cousin of my sister-in-law, got eliminated. Too bad, I would have really liked an insider for the blog. Michell, I still would like an interview for the blog, let me know when you want to do it.
Shockingly the two drunks got roses, but my early favorites to take home the bacon (farm reference) are Kelsey, Britt and Megan. Whatever happens this season promises to be epic as these wonderful ladies try to navigate this maize (farm reference) on their journey to find true love.
No comments:
Post a Comment