The Bachelor Gives Back

Let's Get Crunk!

Finally, the dating begins.  There is no better way to see how a guy will act in the real world than going on some normal everyday dates and we all know a good time is coming once charity gets involved.

One on One: Eric
Who hasn't started a date at the beach followed by a helicopter ride to go snowboarding followed by a nightcap in a beautiful cabin?  We learn that Eric is now cool with getting married because a lot of his friends have gotten married and they are still cool and their lives aren't over (perhaps he was thinking of JBJ readers Canon and Kristen, you guys made a great impression on him!)  Did anyone else find Eric talking about near death in Syria a little eery?

Group Date: Stripping For A Cause
Before I break down the group date I would like to announce that my wife is going to be out of town on Thursday and I will be hosting a charity event at the house.  If you are a local stripper or female with so/so morals who likes to make your community better please be at my house with your favorite g-string.  All the money I donate will be returned to me to give to my favorite charity "jonobeingjono gives back".  Nevermind that I take a salary for running jonobeingjono and none of the money actually goes to charity just focus on twerking. 

I must say this date was a brilliant idea to flush out the large percentage of dudes who may or may not be interested in participating in a Bachelorette/Brokeback marathon.  Bingo, right on queue Craig goes gaga over Josh's beautiful face and chest and Tasos is there a reason your speedo is growing and our final victim hairdresser Brett sure seems to have a wandering eye.  Well, that takes care of three potential husbands.

The nightcap ended with a serious record scratch with Craig getting totally wasted and jumping in the pool with Nick S (Nick if you are shocked at why you got sent packing look no further than the moment you decided to jump in the pool with drunk/gay Craig).  

One on One: Chris
Chris is straight adorable.  He meets up with Andi at the horse races and compares himself to Pretty Woman.  I'm not sure I get the comparison, who is the prostitute and didn't Pretty Woman have a no kiss on the lips rule?  It was a beautiful night and I can see the love blossoming.

Cocktail Party:
Josh lets Andi know that he hasn't dated a girl in 5 years.  Why do hot people always try to play the I haven't had a date in X amount of years card?  Cassandra played that card last year and no one believes it.  I'm sure Andi immediately thought oh poor Josh he can't find a girl who would go out on a date with him, I'll date him.

In the end Carl, Craig and Nick S get the boot.  Many were surprised by Carl, but not me, the sheer number of tats he exposed when he took his shirt off for charity spelled the end for him.  Craig and Nick took a drunk swim together and then had to take the walk of shame off the show together.