Bachelor Recap - Kissing, Crying, Sobbing and Lennay Kekua

My Neck Hurts

I am going to have to fight through my puffy eyes to type this week.  There was a lot of crying going on and this time it wasn't just the girls seeking true love.

For those of you that are interested in my fantasy bachelor league, my only remaining girl is AshLee and after this week I couldn't be happier with my pick, I had a feeling this week would be her coming out party.  When she told Sean about being adopted I melted and when it brought Sean to tears (legitimate tears at that) I fell for Sean, he is the most legit bachelor ever and deserves true love.

Now, on to the hysterics.

One on One Date - White Leslie:
Is anyone else as impressed as I am that Sean's dad holds a Guinness World Record?  He traveled the 48 contiguous states in 97 hours.  I am a connoisseur of maps and I found the feat quite impressive.  Not wanting to be outdone Sean and Leslie are given the opportunity to have the longest on camera kiss and proceed to give us the most boring 3 minutes and 17 seconds in Bachelor history.  I had to hit my 30 second button three times I was so bored.

We then found out that Leslie is smart because she took some AP classes.  Who hasn't failed an AP exam?  jonobeingjono failed three of them.  You are going to have to show me more than that to prove your intelligence.  

Group Date - A Day at the Beach:
So the group date gave the girls a good chance to break out the bikinis and act a fool.  In the end they had a volleyball grudge match to see who would have the opportunity to spend quality 1 on 6 time with Sean.  As an accomplished volleyball player myself I saw that the ringer was clearly Des.  I am not buying that the match was that close after seeing her serve.

The best part of the whole episode was watching the reaction of the losing team, literally crying.  Kristy
completely lost it that she would not have the change to have quality 1 on 6 time and was literally crying/sobbing about her misfortune of spending a day at the beach.  Also literally crying on the trip back to the mansion was Black Leslie, which was odd considering her and Sean have not spoken one work to each other.

Sean proceeded to spend time with the 6 winners and Kasie proceeded to implode (I bet she wishes they never won that volleyball game).  As a Bachelor Authority here is a free tip on how not to find true love: DON'T TATTLE.  We all know that snitches get stitches, but apparently Kasie never got the memo.  Kasie's grand plan to woo Sean was to take him aside and tell him that Des and Amanda's relationship was not allowing her to be herself? Huh?  Sean asks for an explanation of how this has anything to do with Kasie and she says she is being put in the middle of Des and Amanda's drama?  5 minutes later and Kasie was literally crying.

One on One Date - AshLee, and the Charity Girls:
The final date card comes and Tierra reads it as AshLee and Selma, psyche it doesn't really say Selma, gotcha suckers.  Tierra then fakes a fall down the stairs right before Sean arrives in an attempt to derail the date.  Pretty normal way to get attention from a man, if you ask me.  Somehow Tierra powered through and skipped a trip to the hospital on a paralysis board, what a trooper.

Sean and Ashlee end up at Magic Mountain and Sean breaks the news that they will be spending the date doing charity work and that two sick girls who are best friends online would be coming and meeting for the first time.  The first girl gets out of the limo and they tell her that the friend she has never met will also be joining them.  The limo pulls up and I thought for sure that Lennay Kukua would be popping out of the limo but alas it was her online friend.

The group spends a fabulous day at Magic Mountain and it ends with both AshLee and Sean literally crying which left jonobeingjono literally crying.   The emotional moment was then ruined when we learned that during their heart to heart convo there was a creepy band standing two feet behind them in the dark the whole time.  Also a little awkward was AshLee saying I want as many kids as I can pop out..........errrrrrrrrrrrrrr..........as my husband and I decide to have.  

Cocktail Party:
The final cocktail party just turns into a game of musical chairs with all of the girls pulling at Sean like he is a piece of taffy.

Sean takes Sarah outside and tells her he has a surprise for her, I don't know why but I thought he was surprising her with a prosthetic arm or a hook.  Apparently I am the jerk as Sean is a pure sweetheart bringing her dog to say hello.

Kacie tries to get back in the game after tattlegate by wearing a workout top as a dress.  Kacie, wearing an extra long LuluLemon workout top does not a dress make.  It doesn't work and Sean sends her packing, but of course in true Sean style, in a very classy way.  

Also clipped were Kristy (the devastated volleyballer) and Taryn (no one cares about her).


13 girls remain and if I had to predict who will be fantasysuiting in the end I would go with AshLee, Sarah and White Leslie.

And for who gets the boot next week I'll go with Robyn and Daniella.